And so, inevitably, Spring comes around, the tide turns, and we surface.
It’s been a month since I last posted and it’s been a very strange experience. I’m back, I think, attempting to understand what blogging was all about, why I burned out.
So much has happened in four weeks I don’t know where to begin.
I fell in love. I think. At least, I met someone and we’re still meeting.
I learned that at 42, sex isn’t a given. Performance can be compromised.
He’s a gorgeous little man called Simon, a white man, more Kenyan than I could ever be. Very surreal. He holds me close and I freeze his eyes.
My sister goes back to Norway on Tuesday. We’ve spent time together, we laughed and things but I’m haunted. If you had a chance to be with someone before they die, what would you do?
How do you spend the 24 hours each day you have with them?
My dog died last week, in the very capable arms of my youngest sister. And like that, twenty years of my life ended.
My gmail registers more than two thousand entries. Where do I begin?
Right now, I’m listening to recordings from people inside the twin towers as they fell.
I kept thinking, these last four weeks that, hey-presto, I’m going to have material to work with, stunning poems to write…and that isn’t the case.
I have the experience of those weeks locked away in my head somewhere…but they are missing on paper.
So inevitably I return to the page, pick up where I left off, shrug my shoulders and try to make sense of what, very quickly, has become a truly odd year.
Where will it end?
It will take me a while to get back to my poetry blog.
Can’t wait to see how all the rest of the postadayers have been doing.
For the rest of you, how have YOU been doing?
♦photo – webstockpro.com ♦