I was pissed off with my meditation session on Saturday.
All about how heaven was going to be India, how I am really, a deity destined to rule in the new kingdom, how the world cycle repeats forever in 5000 year kulpas and how there is no redemption from the karma you generate.
I was pissed off with a Baptist pastor who decieded, all of a sudden, to go off on Muslims.
I was pissed off with God for the Palestinian situation.
And I’m pissed off with prayer request packages that come with easy payment plans.
I am anxious to follow God’s word, anxious to do good by him.
Sometimes I want to make him what I believe him to be.
I want him to align himself to how I view the world.
Are I am a divine being too?
Do I have a role in creation?
How do I deal with my thoughts on Right and Wrong within the Church?
As I continue bringing my anxiety to God, I learn that trust comes at the end.
That I am tasked to think, to inquire, to pray, to contemplate, first, and then to have faith and display trust.
I am not a piece of wood.
I can know what is right and what is wrong.
I can be responsible for the choices I make on how I approach God, how I listen to him, and how I obey.
The pastor who has abused their position, can be forgiven.
I needn’t destroy another human being, in order to stay true to God.
I needn’t toss and turn and worry everyday, over everything, once I have brought these things to God.
I can be myself and trust God and not be silly.
I can live free of anxiety – I must – because anxiousness is based on fear and lies.
TAKE A LOOK!