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Day eighty three; What is Angry?

03 Jun

 

 

I’ve been a little irritated this week.

I’m irritated now.

I can’t put my finger on it.

I went to meditation this morning.

I looked at the ‘truth’ of who I am – i.e. I am soul.

 

I went to church and there I found that singing makes me feel good.

I went to one more service and took communion.

I came home to find that Simon’s aunt had died, and the Queen of England is sixty years on the throne.

 

I am irritated for no particular reason…I’m running out of money, but not yet, I have a court case on Tuesday but not yet.

I’ve been spending a lot of time on Reddit, and realising that the internet can bring out the worst in me.

I so enjoy having my say on this topic and that, with taking jabs at those who don’t agree with me, with ‘standing my ground.’

Is it true you can be whoever you want to be on the net?

It doesn’t work for me. I have to be honest whatever I’m doing.

 

I’ve achieved a great deal since I started this a month before Easter.

 

Now I’m ready to finish.

 

Will it have made a difference? Do I know what this was all about?

 

“Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing. (Proverbs 12:18)

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6 Comments

Posted by on June 3, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , ,

6 responses to “Day eighty three; What is Angry?

  1. Paula Tohline Calhoun

    June 5, 2012 at 05:30

    Don’t give in or up quite yet, Kenny. All has not been loss. . .but oddly enough we have reached the same pothole in our journey. . .

    I wrote a post for today on anger. . .you have to approve it of it to be published.

    I send my love. I could really use a sit-down at the campfire with my friend and our Friend.

    Paula

     
    • kolembo

      June 5, 2012 at 07:28

      hey Paula!

      Onward! I’ve been following the meditation ups and downs like a shadow!

      I think what I’ve seen is what is on my mind often reflects what happens over the course of my day.

      So I can’t wait to get over anger!

      Ahhh, well, two weeks to go, we’re still here, and Jesus has been walking with us rather than us with Jesus me thinks!

      Wishing you the best…try and get a glimpse of the Venus transit today – for you it’s sunset – tell Ashley you need to get a set of welding glasses (get plastic, cheap from wall mart or something) and look for a dot on the Sun!

       
      • Paula Tohline Calhoun

        June 5, 2012 at 17:27

        AH! So we shall watch Love pass by! But only for it to be nearer to us, right? Whatever. . . God is even in charge of the stars and planets and governs their courses, the times of their risings and settings, Surely, as recently, as my spirits have “set,” then they shall indeed rise again! Can’t help it – that’s just the way God works!

        You must know of a poet – she is probably among my top ten favorite people and poets in the world – Maya Angelou. I cannot claim to understand the plight of a black person among whites, nor do I have the communal history of slavery running in my blood, but what I do have is the experience of being a woman in what is sometimes a man’s world; but more than that I have the experience of being a slave to sin, and a slave to my own anger, selfishness, greed, and despair. So, at times like this, there is no better poem to read and/or remember – and your last few lines to me in your comment made me remember it again – this poem of Angelou’s:

        Still I Rise

        You may write me down in history
        With your bitter, twisted lies,
        You may trod me in the very dirt
        But still, like dust, I’ll rise.

        Does my sassiness upset you?
        Why are you beset with gloom?
        ‘Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells
        Pumping in my living room.

        Just like moons and like suns,
        With the certainty of tides,
        Just like hopes springing high,
        Still I’ll rise.

        Did you want to see me broken?
        Bowed head and lowered eyes?
        Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
        Weakened by my soulful cries.

        Does my haughtiness offend you?
        Don’t you take it awful hard
        ‘Cause I laugh like I’ve got gold mines
        Diggin’ in my own back yard.

        You may shoot me with your words,
        You may cut me with your eyes,
        You may kill me with your hatefulness,
        But still, like air, I’ll rise.

        Does my sexiness upset you?
        Does it come as a surprise
        That I dance like I’ve got diamonds
        At the meeting of my thighs?

        Out of the huts of history’s shame
        I rise
        Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
        I rise
        I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide,
        Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
        Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
        I rise
        Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
        I rise
        Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
        I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
        I rise
        I rise
        I rise.

        Maya Angelou

        God’s blessings on you Kenny. Write for me a poem, please? I need one from you! I shall write one for you today, my “Muse Day Tuesday.” You are right. Jesus has been with us more than the other way around. . .I am so thankful that He is so much more dependable than I. Still, I shall rise. . .

         
      • kolembo

        June 5, 2012 at 21:05

        You should see the size of the grin on my face…I’ve got butter from my toast-and-spahgetti-and-special-sauce dinner smudged round my lips!

        Still I rise!

        Ak, it will lift when it does!

         
  2. Paula Tohline Calhoun

    June 5, 2012 at 23:43

    I just posted my Muse Day Tuesday poem. It is for you. I expect some reciprocation.

     
    • kolembo

      June 6, 2012 at 10:22

      Haha, Paula!

      Ahhhh, I’m just going over there now, but I already feel love.

      Did you see the Venus Transit?

      I cast a thought just for you, flung it at the center, and heard you laugh.

      I am coming slowly round to contemplating writing poetry – I think it will happen after I finish the walk – I hope it will happen, I’ve had stirrings but I don’t know what’s there.

      Two weeks my friend, and oh how far you’ve carried me.

      I am forever grateful.

      I send back thoughts of God, caressing his celestial bodies, moving them gently through the night.

       

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